Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter
by Awkward-Normallity
Summary: A/N: [COMPLETE!] A list of things to do if you ever become a Shadowhunter! That's on the top of my Xmas list: To become a Shadowhunter. XD anyway enjoy.
1. Numbers 1-10

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. 1-10.**

1) Sell Jace's weapons over eBay.

2) Ask Isabelle if you can borrow her whip to play round up with demons.

3) Ask Alec if he has to imagine Magnus as Jace when they kiss.

4) Give all the Shadowhunters Christmas with mistletoe on them. Then kiss Jace. XD

5) Hide all sources of coffee away from Clary to see how mental she gets.

6) Show Alec a spider.

7) Keep a demon as a pet.

8) Tell Jace that you and he are related as Valentine is also your father.

9) Burn Jace's piano and when he asks why say that you spilt demon blood on it.

10) _Accidentally_ spill Holy Water on Jace's motorbike.


	2. Numbers 11-20

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. 11-20.**

11) Replace Jace's hair shampoo with blue hair dye and when it's dyed turn round and say I thought you didn't dye your hair!

12) Steal Clary's sketchpad and doodle in it, to see how mad she gets.

13) Claim you can see the future and say that Jace will marry Isabelle and Alec will marry Simon leaving Clary with Magnus. XD

14) Pretend you are the Angel Raziel and see how Jace and the others react.

15) Take all of their steles and replace them with exact replicas made of plastic, so that when they try to draw Marks it doesn't work. When they start to panic state: Now you will have to live like Mundanes, you've been stripped of your Marks!!!

16) Hide all of Magnus's makeup and beauty/hair products and the like.

17) Dress up as a Shax demon for Halloween. (But watch out for the Seraph blades!)

18) When Jace and Clary kiss in the Greenhouse (only applies to City of Bones) jump out from behind some of the plants and scream: To love is to destroy and to be loved is to be destroyed!

19) Mess up Jace's bedroom and then blame it all on Church.

20) Constantly tidy up Magnus' house so that he can't find anything.


	3. Numbers 21-30

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. 21-30.**

21) Paint a painting of Idris and then give it to a demon stating: This is what you'll never see then kill it will a Seraph blade.

22) Sit down in the Institute and create Jalec (JacexAlec) FanFictions.

23) Ask Simon if he is warm enough.

24) Tell Clary that her mum has woken up from being in the hospital.

25) Tell Jace if Clary doesn't want him any more you'll gladly take her place.

26) Give Jace tea with bergamot in it and then hand him a cucumber sandwich.

27) Tell Maia that her brother wants to talk.

28) If you are a werewolf proclaim that you are going marry Raphael, leader of the vampire clan.

29) Tell Alec that he pouts way too often.

30) Give Jocelyn City of Bones to read and then say: That is why you shouldn't leave your children unattended!


	4. Numbers 31-40

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. 31-40.**

31) Give Valentine a replica of the Mortal Cup. (Only applies to when he doesn't have the cup in City of Bones.)

32) Ask Magnus if he prefers kissing Alec over Will.

33) Swap Church and Chairman Meow to see if anyone will notice.

34) Swap everyones wardrobe items around so that Jace ends up with Magnus' clothes and vice versa, Clary ends up with Alec's and Simon ends up with Isabelle's.

35) Dress up as Effie Trinket and pull out Magnus, Jace, Alec, Simon and Luke's name from a bowl and say: "Welcome to the seventy-fourth annual Hunger Games and may the odds be ever in your favour."

36) If you are a Shadowhunter claim that you're engaged to a Downworlder.

37) Cut up all of Isabelle's clothes.

38) Take the shard of Mortal Mirror from Jace and run off with it while laughing like a maniac.

39) Glue a dodgy tasche onto Jace's face and say: Now who is the evil guy twirling the ends of his tasche.

40) When you kill a Demon sing: What have you done today to make you feel proud!


	5. Numbers 41-50

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. 41-50. CHRISTMAS SPECIAL!!!**

41) Tell Alec if he continues to pout like that Santa won't bring him any presents.

42) When you walk past/ are near Jace sing extremely loud a parody of 'Winter Wonderland', but instead make it 'Wayland Wonderland'

43) Sing a parody of 'Frosty the Snowman' but turn it into 'Magnus the Warlock'

44) Force a Santa hat onto Valentine's head but glue it on with super glue so he can never take it off.

45) Glue reindeer antlers to Jace's head and give him elf ears.

46) Hide all of Isabelle's clothes leaving a elf outfit behind in her wardrobe and force her to wear it.

47) Force Magnus to dress up as Santa for a day.

48) Dance around placing Santa hats on everyone's head while singing: Tis the season to be jolly.

49) Get Jace to cook Christmas dinner for everyone, then swap all the food he made with cheese sandwiches.

50) Dress Alec and Jace in Santa costumes. Making sure that Alec is wearing Mr Claus outfits and Jace is wearing Mrs Claus outfits!!!


	6. Numbers 51-60

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. 51-60. New Years' Special!!!!**

51) When it reaches midnight run into Magnus' house and scream: Happy New Year as loud as you can!

52) Ask Magnus if he can do a magic show instead of a firework show.

53) Go with Simon to a fireworks display and when a really bright firework explodes, jump on him and scream: I'll save you Simon!!! The sun can't hurt you!!!!

54) Stand outside the Institute with the Shadowhunters watching the firework show and every so often when a firework explodes scream: Jace!!!! Stop fighting demons I'm trying to watch the fireworks!!!!

55) Make the Shadowhunters sing Auld Lang Syne in harmony with each other.

56) When Jace and Alec are stood near each other bounce over with a bunch of fireworks and say: You can kiss Jace now, Alec!!!

57) Try to give Luke a sparkler.

58) Go to the hospital and yell at Jocelyn, Wake up lazy, you're missing the fireworks!!!!

59) Strap a Demon to a firework to see what happens.

60) Make resolutions such as:

•No blood is allowed for Simon for a whole year

•Jace is not allowed anywhere near a demon, therefore is not allowed to kill one for a whole year.

•Clary is not allowed to sketch in her sketch book for the whole year.


	7. Numbers 61-70

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. 61-70.**

61) Give Simon 'The Twilight Saga' to read.

62) Tell Isabelle that all of her clothes are out of date by at least a second, and see how much she freaks out.

63) Tell Will that a kiss tasting of blood and Holy Water isn't very romantic and that he needs to brush up on his skills.

64) Ask Alec if he suffers from Demonophobia (fear of demons.) seeing as he hasn't killed a demon.

65) Ask Jace if he has a death wish.

66) After doing #65 then go on to asking Jace if he suffers from O.K.D. (Obsessive Killing Disorder.)

67) Ask Clary if she'd ever draw Simon with his shirt off.

68) Tell Alec that falling on his neck on a pin is a VERY bad excuse for getting a love bite from a vampire.

69) Tell Jace that if he doesn't stop killing demons and make friends with them, you are going to kill him.

70) Ask Alec if he and Magnus write romantic poetry to each other.


	8. Numbers 71-80

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. 71-80.**

71) Pretend that you can't see Jace, when he starts getting annoyed totally ignore him then yell, "Jace!!!! Oh no!!!!! Your one true love has left you!!!"

72) Ask Dorothea if she enjoys shutting the door in people's faces.

73) Ask Jace if it is truly necessary to be so heavily armed all the time.

74) Ask Isabelle if she always defends her clothes from criticism.

75) Ask Max if he knows any manga styled Jace and Clary stories.

76) Shout out all over the world: NEVER TRUST A DUCK!!!!!

77) Ask the Shadowhunters if they know what a DS is.

78) Set up a Facebook and Twitter page for Magnus: Magnus Bane @themagnificentwarlock.

79) Tell Jace that Clary took Alec's advice and wrote her mobile number on the bathroom wall.

80) Get the Shadowhunters to play DD.


	9. Numbers 81-90

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. 81-90.**

81) Ask Simon if he constantly feels the need to take off his glasses then put them back on again.

82) Ask Jace if he molested another cat today.

83) Deliberately spill a drink on Jace's new shoes.

84) Ask Jace to get Simon a drink. (Those who have read City of Ashes will know what I mean.)

85) Tell Jace that you can see dead people.

86) Give all the characters a faction: such as Divergent, Dauntless. Etc.

87) Ask Jace to join the Vampires Welfare and Protection Committee. (VWPC)

88) Ask Alec if he agrees with S.P.E.W. (Potterheads will know what this is. And if you don't, where the hell have you been living?!?!?!? Joke.) ;)

89) Ask Magnus if he has his own fashion show, where he shows off his extensive and 'fabulous' wardrobe.

90) Ask Magnus if you are allowed to canoodle in his bedroom.


	10. Numbers 91-100

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. 91-100.**

91) Ask Jace if there is such thing as the Mortal toilet bowl.

92) Get rid of all of Clary's paints then blame it on Isabelle.

93) Ask Isabelle if she would ever carry Church in her handbag.

94) Take a photography class and take photos of the Shadowhunters in unpredictable moments.

95) Shave Jace and Isabelle's hair off when they are asleep.

96) Start a food fight at Magnus' party.

97) Put mud in Isabelle's bed.

98) Replace all of Alec's clothes with rainbow coloured shirts and leather trousers.

99) Replace Church with a different cat to see if anyone notices.

100) Stock all the cupboards with bitter revenge.


	11. Bloopers 1-10

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. BLOOPERS. 1-10.**

1) Burn the Shadowhunter Codex.

2) Do makeovers on all of the Silent Brothers.

3) Urge Isabelle to jump out of the window like she threatened to do.

4) When Valentine calls Jace "Jonathan Morgenstern" start singing 'Thats not my name!'

5) Ask Alec if he would like to try on the Fearless rune again.

6) Ask Clary if she is sure she didn't make up imaginary friends called, Jace, Alec and Isabelle.

7) Ask Alec if he really meant that he would kill Clary.

8) Ask Magnus if he is wearing contacts, to make his eyes look like cat eyes.

9) Tell Luke you left some water in a bowl for him in the car if he gets too hot.

10) Regard Luke's werewolf as 'His Furry Little Problem.'


	12. Bloopers 11-20

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. BLOOPERS. 11-20.**

11) Ask Alec if he enjoys being so melodramatic.

12) Give Jace some bubble mixture to play with seeing as he is so fascinated with making them from the Portal in the Institute.

13) Decorate all the rooms in the Institute a hot pink.

14) Ask Jace if his one true love has rejected him yet.

15) Take the werewolves for a waxing session.

16) Take the vampires to a tanning salon.

17) Tell Jace to get 'real' tattoos.

18) Ask Clary that if she wanted Jace to tattoo her, tell him to take her to Vegas.

19) Ask Jace if he would like to join you on an investigation: his code name shall be Baron Hotschaft Von Hugenstein.

20) Force Jace to drink a drink at Magnus' party which is pink.


	13. Bloopers 21-30

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. BLOOPERS. 21-30.**

21) Start singing 'Blood' by my chemical romance to Simon when he hasn't drunk anything in a while.

22) Give Simon a drink of fake Halloween blood.

23) Challenge Jace to a jumping competition.

24) When you go out to hunt demons yell: "Let's do this thing!!" To see how many weird looks you get.

25) Keep pushing Jace to see of he ever loses his balance.

26) Wear a shirt saying 'I'm a mate of werewolves.' when you are around Luke.

27) Steal Jace's flying motorbike and sing 'I believe I can fly.' when you fly it.

28) Sing 'Where my demons hide' when you go hunting demons with the Shadowhunters.

29) Ask Jace if he draws on his arms with marker pen.

30) Call Jace a wannabe goth weirdo.


	14. Bloopers 31-40

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. BLOOPERS. 31-40.**

31) Ask Valentine if he would like some berries. (Read HG and you'll know.) ;)

32) Force Jace to wear a very stupid looking hat for the day.

33) Tell Jace he has to take you up to the greenhouse for your birthday. ;)

34) Give Simon a chessboard coated in blood.

35) Ask Simon if he gets hungry for blood watching the Hunger Games.

36) Force Clary to drink ALL of the water in Lake Lyn in Idris.

37) Put eyeliner on Alec.

38) Replace Jace's piano with a violin and when he starts playing say: Now it sound like you've lost your one true love.

39) Ask Alec if he has ever taken some of Isabelle's makeup to use on Magnus.

40) Give Luke a chew toy for his birthday.


	15. Bloopers 41-50

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. BLOOPERS. 41-50.**

41) When Jace pulls out a Seraph Blade say, "Did your parents never teach you NOT to play with knives!"

42) When Valentine takes the Mortal Cup shout: "I was about to have a drink from that!!!"

43) Draw Marks on every inch of your skin.

44) Tell everyone that you can create new Marks.

45) When the Shadowhunters are searching for the Mortal Cup tell them you've searched underneath the beds, inside the sofa and in the fridge.

46) When the Shadowhunters are having a meeting the Inquisitor, bounce into the room wearing a wooly penguin hat.

47) Tell all the Shadowhunters that you have caught the oh-so-fatal Demon Pox.

48) Give Jace a mirror and see if he stares into it saying, "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all."

49) Try to play fetch with Luke.

50) Tell Jace he has a twin brother.


	16. Bloopers 51-60

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. BLOOPERS. 51-60.**

51) Dress up exactly like Magnus Bane.

52) Throw confetti in the air and say "I hear wedding bells ringing!" when you walk past Jace and Clary.

53) Pretend that you have a power like Tessa's.

54) Tell Will that Tessa doesn't love him therefore you'll gladly take her place.

55) When Luke rugby tackles the demon child through the shop window yell, "Luke!!! You better hope that Isabelle doesn't buy her clothes from there!!! She'll get so very mad at you!!!"

56) Tell Jace that he isn't actually a 'real' person.

57) Ask Jace if he has a flirt/hotness button. If so could he kindly turn it off, as you find it very distracting to be around him.

58) Pull on Isabelle's hair to see if it is a wig.

59) Swap Alec and Isabelle's clothes around and force them to wear each others' clothes.

60) Start a Shadowhunter cult over Facebook.


	17. Bloopers 61-70

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. BLOOPERS. 61-70.**

61) Wear Magnus' silk canary yellow pyjamas with fluffy green alien slippers, everywhere.

62) Take a picture of Jace while he is sleeping and send it to everyone you know.

63) Tell Luke that he is free to wag his tail happily if he wants.

64) Join the fey at the party and dance till your legs drop off.

65) Run down the street naked with antlers sprouting from your head.

66) Tell Jem that he needs more colour, then take Clary's paints and cover him in them.

67) Bring a dog towards Clary to see if she is now scared of them due to the Ravener attack.

68) Have a bath in spaghetti.

69) Tell Jace that leaving knives on the stairs can be very dangerous, it could cause two people to fall in love. XD

70) Rip even more holes in Jace's pyjamas.


	18. Bloopers 71-80

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. 71-80.**

71) Pretend that you can't see Jace, when he starts getting annoyed totally ignore him then yell, "Jace!!!! Oh no!!!!! Your one true love has left you!!!"

72) Ask Dorothea if she enjoys shutting the door in people's faces.

73) Ask Jace if it is truly necessary to be so heavily armed all the time.

74) Ask Isabelle if she always defends her clothes from criticism.

75) Ask Max if he knows any manga styled Jace and Clary stories.

76) Shout out all over the world: NEVER TRUST A DUCK!!!!!

77) Ask the Shadowhunters if they know what a DS is.

78) Set up a Facebook and Twitter page for Magnus: Magnus Bane @themagnificentwarlock.

79) Tell Jace that Clary took Alec's advice and wrote her mobile number on the bathroom wall.

80) Get the Shadowhunters to play DD.


	19. Bloopers 81-90

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. BLOOPERS. 81-90.**

81) Dress up like the Doctor and run around waving a sonic screwdriver in the Shadowhunters' faces.

82) Give Jace a poisonous apple and say that he'll have to kiss himself to wake up.

83) Do all of Magnus' hair and makeup.

84) Click your fingers like Magnus to try and get the television to turn off.

85) Pretend to be a vampire and run around outside the Institute.

86) Howl at the full moon every night.

87) Ask Jace if he has ever been seduced by a werewolf.

88) Dress up like Edward Cullen and race after Jace trying to drain his blood.

89) Promise to do Isabelle's makeup for her for a year.

90) Pretend to be giving the Shadowhunters wine to drink but really give them blood.


	20. Bloopers 91-100

**Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter. BLOOPERS. 91-100.**

91) Dress up like Isabelle and Tessa.

92) Steal Clary's sketch pad and burn it before her eyes.

93) Make your own version of the Clockwork soldiers.

94) Constantly try to turn yourself into a werewolf.

95) Wear luminous clothes when you go hunting demons.

96) Give Simon different drinks at Magnus' parties to turn him into different animals.

97) Bring a robotic dog called K9 to a meeting of the Clave.

98) Try to burn down the demon towers in Idris.

99) If you are a werewolf sneak into Idris without declaring yourself at the gate.

100) Dress up like Captain Jack Sparrow and invite the Shadowhunters on every adventure.


	21. THANK YOU

**_Hi fellow Shadowhunters,_**

 ** _I would just a to say a really HUGE THANK YOU to everyone who has read and enjoyed this book._**

 ** _But it is with great sadness that I must now inform you that this story is completed. Nooooooo!!!! It can't end!!!! Haha, but all good things must come to an end. You are all amazing and your support has been fantastic._**

 ** _So thank you each and every one of you for reading and enjoyed 'Insane Things To Do If You Become A Shadowhunter.'_**

 ** _Bye for now,_**

 ** _Your crazy random author,_**

 ** _ApocalypticCas. :)_**

 ** _Until next time everyone!_**

 ** _And remember:_**

 ** _Shadowhunters, have been looking better in black than the widows of our enemies since 1234. XD_**


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